What a crazy year 2020 has been. Started off well and then like a tornado Covid-19 came and whipped most us off our feet.
For some of us, we have been given the gift of time. With time came introspection for me. I took this opportunity to figure our my strengths and weaknesses. I needed to process them in order to develop into a stronger better me for the future.
This journey of introspection is sometimes a hard pill to swallow. Especially if we stand on the outside looking in, seeing the bitterness / ugliness others sees.
I had to acknowledge many things that had to be changed before I could start working on becoming a better me.
For the last few years I have had more off days than on days. All I wanted to do was sleep and be alone and not be amongst family or friends.
I had to identify if I am depressed or just having many off days.
I have attached this link below to give a better understanding of what depression is.
To often I have to remind myself of the things I must be grateful for just so that I can help motivate myself to carry on.
Growing up as an only child and being reared to be independent taught me nothing but isolation. Also how to cope being lonely. This is not a good thing because I have the ability wear my happy face mask while I cut out the world that surrounds me when I’m going through my darkest days.
I find that that my family or closest friends don’t really know the real me. Some of them don’t appreciate me at all. They don’t ask my opinion before making decisions that affects everyone including myself.
I feel used and disrespected. It’s not right. If they don’t value me, I will have to put them aside and start to value myself. Right now they are killing me while I am helping them live their best lives.
I had to post this motivational video that I came across as it helps to keep me going.
Have a wonderful week ahead filled with happiness, peace of mind, tranquility and faith.
Lotsa love and blessing.